When you gonna realise, it was just that the time was wrong.

Confused by my feelings, I still think about you fondly, but I’m not sure why. Do I still like you? Do I miss your friendship? Do I only long for your company because I know you’ll treat me right? Does life have to be so confusing? I wish I could figure it out. Do you still like me? Do you ever think about what we had, and miss it? I know I do, but I’m still confused as to why. Would you be willing to give me another chance if it turns out I still like you? Have you really forgiven me? I wish I had the courage to ask you these questions, I wish I could hear you give me the answers. I wish you could know how badly I regret how I broke it off. I wish I could go back. I wish you could understand how sorry I am for hurting you. I wish you could see the sincerity behind my words. I wish I could somehow show you, and tell you. I know you said it was okay, but I still feel like I owe you an apology for the rest of our lives. I’m really so sorry. I want to fix the damage I caused. I wish I’d kept that necklace. I adored it. It was so beautiful. I can’t believe I was so insensitive as to return it to you like that. I’ve made many mistakes in my life, but I regret none more than how I treated you those last few days. Should you ever chance upon this post, I’m sorry I was a bitch to you. I’m even sorrier, for being such a coward that I couldn’t say this to your face. All I know is I still care deeply for you, and it still upsets me that I hurt you so badly, it’s so unlike me, and you didn’t deserve it. Not at all. Nobody deserved it less. Once again, I’m sorry. So very sorry.

Gotta start somewhere . . .

I never know how to start a blog or anything like this, but I’m just going to get right into it and start here, with today.

Well, today I feel like absolute crap. Slept in until 10:30 only because I had no urge or reason to actually get out of bed. I cried a little bit, then I dragged a duvet downstairs and plonked myself in front of the TV to try and distract myself from my misery. As you can guess it didn’t work for long. Then at lunch time my mam brought my sister home from school, as she was finished early today. She joined me on the couch, I felt a little better but then I got sick around 3:20pm and have been feverish and sickly since.  I’m very lonely at the moment and I’m full of mixed emotions about people, and just really tired of people letting me down and disappointing me.  I’m going to use the tags to let people know my feelings and emotions.